I know that I have been absent from my blog for a while. Life has been happening but I am fine.
I went to a bookstore with my friend and we saw lots of books on clearance. I had a hard time picking the books I wanted to buy. I felt sad not picking some books being the book lover I am.
My friend on the other hand was picking the books she wanted. She included a book I wanted and paid for it. She said it is a gift from her.
A Redbird Christmas by Fannie Flagg.
It is Christmas season in few weeks and I cannot wait to see how it goes.
What are your favorite Christmas books? Have you gotten books as gifts? Let me know in the comments.
Sisi Excel went to a wedding recently. She was enjoying herself with the wedding activities.
The MC (Master of Ceremonies) of the day was doing his best to liven the atmosphere as people were sitting on their chairs waiting for food.
The MC decided to share recharge cards (airtime) for the people who will participate in his quiz.
Meanwhile, Sisi Excel was pressing her phone and chatting with her friend.
The MC asked a question that was familiar to Sisi Excel. Sisi stood up in front of the wedding guests to answer the question with all the confidence she could mustered.
Could you believe the MC cancelled the answer? It was obvious even to the blind man that the answer Sisi Excel gave was the correct one for the quiz.
Sisi could not back down without a fight. She vehemently told the MC that her answer was right and why was he rejecting the answer?
The MC replied by informing the whole wedding guests that Sisi Excel cheated because she googled the answer from her phone.
Never in Sisi Excel’s life has she seen such a public false accusation.
Sisi told the MC to stop calling her a cheat because she never cheated and she was chatting with her friend online not googling the answer.
The embarrassment was too much for the MC. He had to call the DJ(Disc Jockey) to play some music to diffuse the atmosphere.
The music went on for some time and Sisi Excel forgot about the MC who rejected her answer.
Towards the end of the wedding, this same MC came to Sisi Excel’s table and told her he purposely rejected her answer so he will not give her the MTN recharge card of 200 naira.
Sisi Excel’s reaction⬇️ So because of MTN 200 naira recharge card, you are doing like this🥴
Sisi Excel was talking to a lady who was forming fake poshness.
Excel could tell the lady was trying too hard by the way she was unnecessarily stressing her phonics.
Infact, the lady, let us call her Posh Auntie was using different accents in just a conversation.
Sisi Excel heard American accent, British accent and Nigerian accent all through the conversation by just one person.
Posh Auntie got so animated in her narration. She was making grammatical blunders and Sisi Excel was wondering how to politely correct her without her being upset.
Posh Auntie: I am telling you. The man was so unresponsible.
Sisi Excel: You mean, “irresponsible”?
Posh Auntie: No! I mean he was so unresponsible. The unresponsibleness was too much. I know what I am saying.
Sisi Excel’s reaction⬇️ Unresponsibleness kwa. I need latest English Dictionary biko😂🤣
Could you believe I forgot that today is my blog’s one year anniversary with WordPress?
WordPress had to remind me this morning. Thank you, WordPress.
This day last year was the day I took a bold step and created a blog where I could share my love for reading and writing with the whole world and it has been a pleasant journey so far.
To all my subscribers, I am thankful for staying with me for a whole year. You all are wonderful and I am blessed to have you.
To all the authors whose books I have reviewed. Thank you for trusting my blog and for sharing wider publicity too.
To the book tours companies I have worked for this past year. I am thankful for the chance to work with you.
To anyone who I failed to mention, this heart of mine is grateful.
To WordPress, thank you for letting me use this blogging app and thank you for reminding me about my blog’s anniversary. I will keep flying with WordPress by God’s grace.
Happy anniversary to my book blog. The Book Chic Blog is one year old today!🧁🎂💃
Sisi Excel left her phone at home so that it could be fully charged as the electricity supply popular in Nigeria is a fluctuating one. Whenever there is a power supply, everybody in the house do hurry to charge their phones, lamps, laptops, radios and what have you.
Throughout the hours Sisi Excel was away from home, she assumed her phone would be fully charged by the time she returns home.
Alas, it was not so. Sisi Excel met her phone battery at 34% since morning that she left the phone.
Worse of all,her Facebook account was logged out. Sisi knew somebody interfered with her social media accounts as her WhatsApp messages were updated to the last hour before the mobile data was switched off.
Sisi Excel tried logging into her Facebook account, the password was invalid. She tried to calm her panic but she failed woefully. She tried another angle with the password, the Facebook robot kept on rejecting all the passwords.
This time around, Sisi was hysterical and angry. She started shouting at her siblings to admit about using her phone. Each sibling denied the accusation.
The sweat that started coming out of Sisi Excel’s body could not be explained scientifically. Excel’s mind ran in circles. She flashedback to when she newly created the Facebook account and how she grew the account to where it is today.
Sisi thought of the numerous helpful Facebook groups she joined and how exciting being their member gave her. She thought of her online book club, her reviewers and bloggers groups, her cake and cooking grouyp, tailoring groups and the never ending supply of news on her news feed.
Sisi Excel was ready to cry that moment. She had to pray over her Facebook account. She needed that account back as everybody knew her with that same account and where would she start from if she lost the original Facebook account?
To Sisi Excel, her Facebook account was her global village virtually. Without traveling out, the app helps her to connect with everybody in the whole world including favourite book authors.
There was nothing Sisi could do. She kept on trying the password but the account was inaccessible.
When it was clear that there was nothing that could be done to recover the account, Sisi mentally resolved to create a new Facebook account. It was a painful decision.
Just as she was about to click on the “Create an account” button, she decided to try her password on the first account that was inaccessible. She tweaked the password and boom! She logged in!💃💃💃
The joy in her heart was overwhelming. God really answered her. That is why he is God. She did a happy dance in her living room and refreshed the Facebook page in case she was dreaming.😂😂.
That, my Readers is an experience by Sisi Excel. This story is not a marketing content for the Facebook company. Everything written here are mine and I was not told by any Social Media company to write these.
I know we are all in the digital age, are there experiences you have had that are similar to my own? Please share with me in the comment box. I cannot wait to read your stories.
If there is one thing I can thank God for about this digital age, I will thank God for technology.
Technology has made life relatively easier for us.
Sisi Excel was sitting quietly pressing her phone. She got a pop up icon on her screen from Google photos showing her memories from 3 years ago.
Sisi quickly touched the icon and memories came back.
She looked at the photos and she felt nostalgic.
The saying that “a photo keeps a thousand memories” is very true.
So if you’re reading this and you are not taking photos or saving them in the cloud, I think you might need to reconsider that choice.
This is not an advertisement or marketing strategy. I can say with all my heart that Google photos is the best in saving photos and it has space worth 15gb for free I think.
So here you go!
Have you taken photos from years back and you forgot about them and recently saw them? How was the feeling like? Please share with me.
Note to my International Readers : this is where I share and write my daily activities in the form of storytelling. The language and style of writing is common in my country, Nigeria.
The character “Sisi” is me of course. Sisi is a Nigerian slang for young lady.
Meet Sisi Excel the story teller and book reviewer.
THE STORY BEGINS…
My fingers has been itching to type(write).
I updated my blog in the early hours of the morning but I needed to write something.
I wrote on papers, my fingers were upset.
Okay, lemme paraphrase. The title of my story is “What Sisi Excel experienced at the market the day she made her hair”.
What a title!🤣
One day , Sisi Excel with the fine face looked at mirror and decided to loosen her ancient Dada of a hair. (I have natural hair and when it roughens early, it looks like dreadlocks).
She took her bath, wore a nice outfit, spray perfume and use a scarf to wrap her hair. She applied lip gloss on her lips and wore her pink shades. She cleaned her slippers and was ready for the trek to the market😂
As she was trekking, one fine car like that slowed down.
Sisi Excel decided to look at the car in case na Mr. Right aka UK visa and passport .🤭
She sharpaly carried her face away o.
It was one brother like that in her area.
The brother no hide the fact say he like Sisi Excel.
Is it greetings or free rides?
Sisi Excel no gree o. She no support neighborhood romance at all😂
But the look and expectancy on Brother’s face when he asked Sisi Excel of her destination made Sisi Excel to pity him.
True, that brother don try but Excel dey find something so she no fit agree for one sided relationship.
Sisi Excel entered the car based on pity. January to December, na so so shege the brother collect from her hand.
Them no dey force love.😂
As IyaAdura aka Sisi Excel entered the fine clean car like this. She turned her face to the window and starting binding and casting.
She prayed in her heart that the brother shouldn’t ask her out because the rejection fit make the guy to vex and Sisi Excel was enjoying the AC and free music.😂
As merciful as Jehovah God is, he answered her prayers by making Brother to pick one of the neighbors with her plenty children.😂
This was how everybody enjoyed free ride and quietness until Brother dropped everyone at the junction.
Sisi Excel turned to thank Brother and met this man smiling like he won 5 free tickets to UK and landed properties in Dubai.
Sisi Excel heart beat that moment. She turned to her neighbor, the woman was thinking of packing her kids from the car.
Excel looked at Brother again and smiled “Thank you, sir”.
She came out and Brother drove off too fast.😂
Sisi Excel got to the market. This was her first time of making her hair at the market as her usual hairdresser was unavailable.
Excel combed her massive Afro and the women around were exclaiming ” See long Virgin hair. Aunty, the hair dey pain you so? See as the hair too full and thick ” bla bla bla
When it was time to braid the hair, one fine auntie that was forming posh came to chat with the hairdresser plaiting Excel’s hair.
Sisi Excel got to the market. This was her first time of making her hair at the market as her usual hairdresser was unavailable.
Excel combed her massive Afro and the women around were exclaiming ” See long Virgin hair. Aunty, the hair dey pain you so? See as the hair too full and thick ” bla bla bla
When it was time to braid the hair, one fine auntie that was forming posh came to chat with the hairdresser plaiting Excel’s hair.
It was never Sisi Excel’s intention to eavesdrop but the conversation was above her hair directly close to her ears so she heard everything as in everything. 😂😂
I am not doing tatafo but the auntie no try too.
The hairdresser and posh auntie were gossiping about one of their friend that “surprisingly” got married.
They were shocked and were repeating ” So Cynthia just marry like that?”
Posh Auntie told the hairdresser that she plans on getting ” belle ” so the guy will marry her.
It seemed Cynthia was the bad egg among them so her marriage was shocking😂.
The hairdresser kept quiet.
Posh Auntie was embarrassed so she turned the conversation on Sisi Excel’s hair. ” Na Virgin hair be dis? Auntie, which day you go put relaxer? Wait o, you no dey wear earrings so?
The hairdresser told Posh Auntie ” Na deeper life she be, she no dey wear earrings “
Sisi Excel looked at the hairdresser and said ” Which day I tell you say I be deeper life? I just no dey wear earrings. E no get why”.
Posh Auntie started lecturing Excel on the fundamentals of jewelries. She showed Sisi Excel her two ears full of excessive piercings. She remarked that she can’t step outside without her earrings, that she is surprised at Excel.
Excel had to look at Posh Auntie to assess why she found Cynthia’s marriage unbelievable.
The auntie looked like somebody in her late twenties sha. I am not sure.
The hairdresser replied ” _E good as she marry fast fast. Time no dey so make she born for the man before he go outside”.
Posh Auntie started doing self pity. It seemed like her relationship wasn’t heading towards marriage because she spoke about her “guy”.
Excel kept quiet and when Posh Auntie finally paused her lectures, she told Posh Auntie ” But I am beautiful na “.
Posh Auntie didn’t agree o. She told Sisi Excel that ” when you wear earrings, men go notice you”.
Excel had to seriously look at Posh Auntie and determine the colour of her confusion.
Sisi Excel had to mentally flashback to all the men she has seen who didn’t bother over the absence of earrings on her ears. Sisi Excel was sure those men knew her ear holes were empty yet they chased her so where did Posh Auntie get the conclusion?
Finally finally, Posh Auntie left and the Hairdresser told Excel to ” no mind her. See the cloth she wear sef”😂😂
Fear Hairdressers.
Las las, Sisi Excel made her fine hair and went home.
I am so delighted to share this exciting news with you all. I got an email from Goodreads, my bookshelf app informing me of my 2020 reading challenge.
I successfully completed my reading challenge for this year! Whoo-hoo!
Being an avid reader whose nose is always in a book. I find this an achievement in my book reading journey
Actually, I have read more than 84 books before I started blogging but the books recorded on Goodreads says “84” and I have no problem with that.
I use Goodreads app to drop my book reviews and to read book blurbs and reviews of other readers. It is a good app. I highly recommend it.
I can list the advantages of Goodreads and the most important fact about this app is that you discover other book buddies like you and follow more authors.
Are you on Goodreads?
Please connect with me on Goodreads at Excel Andy. I would love to meet more book buddies.
Have an exciting and happy Christmas and don’t forget to stay safe!
Copa Excel during her Monthly CDS(Community Development Service) meetings.
Excel and the roasted corn seller were laughing over some funny customers who were pricing the roasted corn at unreasonable prices. The roasted corn seller muttered some insults at them and sold hot corn on the cob for Excel.
Copa Excel stopped to buy some fresh fruits at a nearby kiosk. While waiting for the seller to attend to her,a man who has been staring at Excel came up to her to inquire if Excel attended his church the previous day.
Excel has never seen such a person in her life before. She quickly bought her fruits and made polite but hasty conversation with the man who still insisted that Excel attended his church that Sunday. He even described the people Excel came in. Copa Excel was a bit alarmed. She assumed he must be a stalker so she walked fast and ran the whole way to her room in the Corper’s lodge.
The next day,she dressed up and went to work. While returning from her workplace with her colleague, the same man called her name from a three storey building. She looked up as he motioned for her to come up through the stairways to his office.
Copa Excel looked at her colleague and asked if it was wise to see that man. Her colleague told her to check and know what he wanted to say.
Excel took the stairs and got to his office. She saw the same man that accosted her at the fruit kiosk the previous day. She was about to bolt when a friendly looking man invited her into the office.
Excel Andy
Mr. Friendly Face smiled at her and told her to sit beside Mr. Stalker. Mr. Stalker smiled at Excel and said “You’re more beautiful up close. I knew what I saw in my church.”
Copa Excel knew right there that she took a bad decision to inquire over why Mr. Stalker called her from his office. She decided to ignore him because he was staring at her in a way that suggested unhidden lust as if he hasn’t seen a woman in a long time.
Excel shifted uncomfortably in her seat and asked in a tough voice, “whydo you want to see me?”
Mr. Friendly Face took over the discussion. He spoke about religion and the need to serve God and be faithful. All those times he was speaking,Copa Excel was trying to know the essence of her presence in the office.
Meanwhile, Mr. Stalker was staring at all parts of Excel’s body especially her upper extremity. He got bold and carried one of her hand into his big palm. Excel removed her hand quickly. He smiled and rested his palm on her thigh. Excel couldn’t take it anymore. She raised her voice and ask if he can’t keep his hands to himself. He muttered an apology and kept to himself.
Copa Excel got angry and interrupted Mr. Friendly Face. She asked to know the purpose of this unnecessary meeting. Mr. Friendly Face smiled at Excel and said “This is your husband. Mr. Stalker wants to marry you. Please be his wife”.
Excel looked at Mr. Stalker from head to toe and she didn’t like what she saw. Mr. Stalker is not what is called “attractive” in Excel’s dictionary. His skin colour wasn’t smooth or beautiful. His potbelly described him as a lover of beer and meat. His teeth were gap toothed and he didn’t have a good dentition whenever he smiled. In short,Mr. Stalker was disqualified in Excel’s eyes.
When she finished her appraisal,she asked Mr. Stalker why he wishes to marry her. Mr. Stalker replied “I have been seeing this lady more than thrice after praying. I first saw her in my church dancing. The second day,I saw her buying roasted corn and fruits behind my house and today, she passed through my office. I prayed these three times and immediately my eyes were open,I am always seeing her. Tell me,isn’t that a sign from heaven that she is my wife?”
Copa Excel was just looking at Mr. Stalker who doesn’t believe in the law of coincidences. She smiled at him and said “Mr. Stalker,I am not your wife. I was invited to your church by my friends to celebrate thanksgiving service for the outgoing corpers. The other time you saw me buying fruits outside,my house isn’t far from the market.I work at the University Staff School and this is the route I follow to and fro. So please,I am not your wife. Please excuse me,I need to start going to my room. It is getting late.”
As Excel stood up to pass,the two men stood up with her and hurriedly started gathering their bags to follow her. Mr. Friendly Face ran after Excel and was trying to make her understand why a marriage to Mr. Stalker was the best.
Meanwhile, Mr. Stalker’s office colleagues were hailing him and congratulating him over his beautiful fiancée,Copa Excel.
Excel started wondering when she became fiancée. She stood and smiled at them. In her mind,she was seething and wondering if the man had mental disorder. Mr. Stalker ran to his HOD’s office and came out with a middle aged man. This man came to Excel and said “congratulations!”
Copa Excel started walking fast. Mr. Friendly Face was shouting at her to slow down that fast walking is not good for a new wife. Excel made up her mind to run. She told herself that those two men are officially mad. From fiancée to wife in just one day to a total stranger whose name she barely remembered.
Just as she was trying to cross the road, the two men caught up with her. She stopped to hear why Mr. Friendly Face was shouting her name. He came up to her and told her to calm down that she is just scared. That Mr. Stalker is a good man capable of taking care of her.
Mr. Stalker came behind Mr. Friendly Face and gave Copa Excel a car key. Excel looked at the key suspiciously and questioningly. He told her that the car key is her key now that she is his wife. Excel decided to play along. She asked for the car. He pointed to a big Sienna model parked in the car park. Copa Excel smiled at him and said she isn’t interested in cars and their keys.
Copa Excel hailed a taxi and stopped at her lodge. She came out of the taxi and saw Mr. Stalker and Mr. Friendly Face waiting for her. Excel got more afraid. She braced up and went to them. Mr. Friendly Face started shouting at her on good behaviours to elders. That Excel is so rude and mannerless bla bla bla.
Excel got tired and told both of them to leave her alone,that she can’t give an answer to something big like marriage so easily and casually.
For days,Mr. Stalker came to Copa’s Excel’s flat to see her. He was really begging her to marry him. Excel has never seen a pathetic scene where a stranger begs to marry another stranger just like that.
The last visit, Copa Excel faced the man and said “No! I won’t marry you. The age gap is there. You lie a lot. You’re an alcoholic. I don’t like you,please look for your age mate and marry”.
Right there,Mr. Stalker started crying. He looked so ugly and pitiful while crying. Copa Excel ran away from the car and stood at a safe distance. Mr. Stalker blared his car horn many times to draw her attention. He blared it severally and Excel reasoned within herself that if he continues to blare his horn,the whole flat mates will come outside to know the source of the noise.
She went to him and begged him to stop his noise. He asked her if she will marry him? Excel said a big fat “No!”
After few conversations, Mr. Stalker finally drove away and he never came visiting anymore. Copa Excel was relieved and happy. She saw Mr. Stalker at few occasions but he never disturbed her again.
Thank you for reading my episodes so far. Do you enjoy them? Should I write more?
Copa Excel and her two roommates were excited to visit the Shoprite Mall at Enugu city. They had planned on how the day would be like and the day came so fast.
These three young ladies boarded a bus from Nsukka to Enugu city. They were so excited. They took lots of photos in the bus,laughed,pointed out fascinating things outside the bus. They were full of happiness because they were taking a break from their hectic work schedules to have fun for themselves.
Finally,they arrived at Shoprite mall. They did window shopping, took lots of photos at good angles in the mall. They really walked from one end of the shopping mall to the other end,glancing at objects they won’t buy and taking photos over and over.
Copa Excel had fun that day. It was time to eat because the excitement at the mall woke up a large appetite in her. She and her roommates went to the provisions store at the mall to see if they could buy something to take home because they couldn’t go empty handed.
Excel went towards the bakery. She saw the price for a large loaf of freshly baked bread at Two hundred and twenty naira only. She bought two loaves of bread because she had heard a lot of hype over the Shoprite bread. Excel bought other little things and prepared to pay for her purchased items.
The queues at each counter were long and slow. Copa Excel and her roommates stood at a queue with less customers. When it got to Excel’s turn to pay,she was surprised at the inflation of the prices. She knew she saw Two hundred and twenty naira for each loaf of freshly baked bread but what was on her receipt was Eight hundred and eighty naira.
Excel had to ask how come her bread prices were inflated. The lady behind the counter spoke with an Igbotic phoney accent,”Oneblead is Four hundred and forty naira. You bought two bleads making them Eight hundred and eighty naira. The prices are on my computer, they are there. Check your receipt well”.
Copa Excel has never seen daylight robbery like this in her life before. She wanted to protest over the unfair price inflation but the customers on the queue were impatient and started murmuring. She had to suppress the urge to tackle that matter right there because she was sure of the price before she picked a product.
Her two roommates dragged her away from the counter to avoid public embarrassment. Excel was so upset but her anger dissipated at the mention of ice cream by one of her roommates. The three of them bought medium containers of ice cream and relished the taste the flavours gave them.
It was time to go home. Copa Excel told her two roommates that she would love to spend the night with her friends at the Nccf state family house. She went there,had a good time catching up with news from her friends.
The next day,Excel planned to return to her local government, Nsukka. She didn’t know how she will go from the family house to the nearest bus stop. She enquired from other corpers at the family house, they gave her directions to the bus park.
Copa Excel hailed a moving bus. She asked the bus conductor if the bus was going to HolyGhost park,he replied some things in Igbo language which Excel assumed was ‘Yes,we dey go. Enter inside,let’s move’.
Other passengers adjusted in their seats so Excel could squeeze in between the spaces. She paid her fare to the bus conductor. Lots of passengers were entering and alighting at different . Copa Excel was wondering whether the bus driver had forgotten she was to stop at HolyGhost Park.
When she couldn’t take her silence anymore,she turned to her neighbor, an elderly man with a kind face. She spoke in English to him as she barely knew how to converse in Igbo language. She greeted him and asked if the bus has passed through HolyGhost park. The kind old man laughed and said, “No,my dear. The bus hasn’t arrived at the park yet. I am also going towards that direction too. Don’t worry,when we get to the park,I will let you know.”
Copa Excel breathed a sigh of relief. She was thankful she wasn’t going off course. She patiently sat in the bus for what seemed like hours when in reality,they were long minutes instead. At last,the bus stopped at the park. The kind old man told Excel that they have arrived at the park. Excel thanked the old man so much. She crossed the road, entered the park,bought a ticket to Nsukka and enjoyed the journey back to her local government. She was thankful she didn’t get lost in Enugu city because of Shoprite.
Thank you for reading this episode. I appreciate your interest and support so far. Episode 7 will be made available. Don’t forget to subscribe to the blog for more email notifications on the Diaries of an Enugu Corper.
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